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The New Year Doesn’t Have to Begin in January, part 2

Why are goals and resolutions important?

We get what we focus on. If we know where we are trying to get, most of the time, we get there! Too often, we just roll into the next year without thinking about what we want to change or how to be different in our lives. We just expect more of the same. The brain likes to know what it needs to do and what it needs to focus on. There is real power in knowing what we want, having a goal, and having a roadmap.

There are many different types of goals and resolutions, such as losing 20 pounds, or completing my novel. It can also be a simple statement of a feeling or a few words, such as “feel more joy” or “feel more grateful”. It can be as simple as establishing positive daily rituals.

It’s important to concentrate not only on what we want or even how we are going to get there, but why we want to meet this goal. What is the result we want? The brain needs to know why. You will always find a way when your reasons for change are big enough.

Try writing down your goals in a places that you see everyday.

There is power in writing things down.  There is power in being reminded.  There is power in wanting to manifest something new in your life and keeping energy focused in a particular direction.

You get to choose what you want to create this year. Knowing that you have this power, and knowing that having a goal and doing a little bit everyday or every week will get you closer, is the first step in the first 30 days of pursuing a dream, a goal, a New Year’s resolution.

Why do people give up? What are the typical obstacles that get in the way of someone changing?

People give up or don’t change for many reasons.

Some of the reasons include:

• Comparing themselves to others. This creates pain and many think they won’t measure up or meet their goal.

• Having impossible deadlines or goals that are too big.

• Not knowing where to start or having a plan.

• Underestimating themselves and their individual power. Many let limiting beliefs take the place of their self-confidence.

• Not having a strong need for change.

• Making excuses, such as lack of time or money

• Having previous failures and wallowing in negative references from the past.

• Expecting perfect and immediate results.

Which one of these may be holding back your goal or your New Year’s resolution?

What helps someone change?

• Don’t compare yourself to anyone. You are you, and you will make your path through this change, and through this year.

• Break down your goal into small achievable steps.

• Have a plan, any plan. It is less about picking the perfect plan than about choosing one.

• Give yourself time and forget about unreasonable time schedules. It’s better to achieve your goal in a year than not at all.

• Remind yourself how intelligent you, your body and your brain is Start believing in yourself

• Listen to your intuition about why something is not working

• If something isn’t working, change something, but don’t just stop completely

• Give yourself an empowering reason why you want this New Year’s resolution: what will it cost you if you don’t, how will you feel if you succeed, who will benefit, and what rewards you will obtain.

• Develop an excuse buster by writing down your common excuses and determine how many times you let them take over your life and your choices.

• Take each day as a new day to start. Leave the past where it belongs. Everyday is a new opportunity, regardless of how many times you tried something before.

• Be kinder to yourself, and don’t beat yourself up if you make a mistake. Be your number one coach and cheerleader and watch your transformation.

• Surround yourself with people that support you. You need to be in an environment that is on your side.

Why is it so hard to keep New Year’s resolutions?

January is a very high-pressure month, as there are many things happening in all areas of our lives after the holidays. It’s also the time of year we want to make a big change or start a resolution. If we don’t succeed in the first few days, weeks, we think we’ve failed….again, year after year.

We need to downplay January and up-play every other month. It doesn’t matter when you start, when you get back on track. Lighten up the January load. Change a bit everyday and you will get much closer to what it is you want.

We all want to be perfect and get it right this time. We hope this year will be different- then its not. That doesn’t feel good. We then hurt ourselves by believing and saying harsh things to our own selves and our brain gives up. It doesn’t feel it can win.

Why are the first 30 days important?

The “First 30 Days” is a metaphor for the beginning stages of any change. The first few days are always the hardest. Your body and mind need to be told and understand what’s involved in this change.  What will be different?   Why is this change happening?  What’s in it for them?  What’s the pleasure component if you succeed?  You will decide how you react when you don’t succeed the first time around and during hard times or when another emotion takes you off track. If you can get through the first few weeks of a change, you start seeing and knowing that you will make it — you will embrace this change.

Science has shown that it takes about 28 days to make a change or develop a habit. The brain literally creates new wiring based on new information it is getting from actions and beliefs you are adopting. Believing you can change and then deciding you can and will are major steps on the way to change.

As the Hindu Proverb says: “When we take one step toward God, He takes seven steps towards us”

We simply need to start, take that first step, trust that we are guided and life will help us along the way.

This post was written by Ariane de Bonvoisin, Founder and CEO of The First 30 Days LLC, http://www.first30days.com.

Jennifer Tankersley: